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Saturday, June 22, 2013
I'm bored out of my wits I'm so bored I'm going crazy oh my god somebody save me please!
It's not the kind of boredom that arises from the lack of things to do; there are always things to do. The problem is when all these activities are unappealing and are unable to dispel the stuffy, gripping feeling that threatens to suffocate my mind with each contraction. Boredom isnt stillness when it reaches this state. It is much like labour; a series of contractions after contractions, your body and the whole of your psychological being trying to push out something that had manifested in you over a period of time.
Insanity. Being quarantined because of the haze is torture. This is war. I am a prisoner of war to my weakness against confinement. Please, I surrender. Please, how can I live through this moment? I know it will not last; I only fear that I wouldnt either.
It might sound funny or ridiculous but I feel like vomiting out of boredom. It's a plague. It's poison. It's like tar that's in my body, glueing my innards into a mass in the core of my body.
I've tried music, exercise, reading, talking. The music became a droning stimulant for migraine, the exercise made me lethargic, reading made me ill, and talking was tedious when I feel so unwell.
Haze. I raise my white flag, but can anyone see it through the fogged atmosphere?
Google, you prove unhelpful when I typed the first sentence to this post in your search box. If you cannot help me, nobody else can. I am doomed. Kill me now. And no, I will not 'do craft', ' call a friend to hang out', or 'play free online games'. I also did not miss it when you added 'if any' after the second suggestion. Just so you know.
SOS.
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Drakon
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