Absurdism

Whenever I'm in one of those moods, I turn to 2 other blogs to read about their take on life, and I find my wiki. I'm not usually a big fan of wiki, because my teachers say it's evil, but it's really convenient. Besides, I remembered to credit my source (: albeit not in an academic and acceptable way.

As I type, Tchaikovsky's Swan Lake is playing. When the rhythm picks up, my typing naturally paces itself accordingly and I reckon I look like one of those maniac pianists.

When I don't work, I have nothing to do and I dwell on my lack of purpose. When I do work, however, I still feel like my existence has no value because I do things that support the current worldly conditions. In no way have I changed the world. I'm just a part of this whole cycle, where people are born and raised, and then they in turn give birth and raise their kids to keep the cycle going. It's as though there is no way that the world can change because the system cannot disintegrate. Society wouldn't let it. See, we seem to have a need for equilibrium. We counter almost any change that occurs because of our ontological anxiety towards the unknown: "who knows what might happen if we...?"

It's kind of like this photo. Okay, maybe not.

...more like this. It's like we're all in that car, and we try so hard to stay like that because any change, any slight movement, might either send us hurling through the air and into the deadly waters, or it might also bring us back to safety on land, where we can find comfort and perhaps drive someplace else to go see Florida's sunrise, but being natural pessimists, our emphasis is on the possibility of falling into the waters, so we're desperate to stay as we are. I would suppose that's why whenever there is any deviation from the norm, say in the economy, we'd go into panic. The same goes for worrying over a fall in birth rates, a rise in sea level, our spaghetti becoming too soggy, and our hm, grades fluctuating.

...

hur.

Well, that aside, I would like to mention that if the world is simply a projection from my mind, I'm probably not a very imaginative person. My world's kind of a bore.

I'd also like to point out that I hate sharing towels, and that I used to be an INFP but I'm not sure now because I feel so out of touch with myself.

Oh, and that there's a Kyushu fair at Tampines Mall.

I want to go to school/university now. Life is easy when you're encouraged to think of stuff that yknow, have usually been thought of before, and when you don't have to take shit from anyone, or to anticipate any, if people seem too nice to you now, ha.