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Thursday, June 10, 2010
When you open up a window, say, Computers, you'll see 'recent places' in the left column.Click on that, and you'll see the places youve visited most recently and frequently, arranged in order from most to least. My 'Guides' folder used to rank #1. This year, the title's been alternating between MSO and SC folders. humanities trail planning, as well as teachers' day planning, follow closely behind. Guides is no longer in the list. A year ago, that would have been unimaginable. A year later, it still is, but there is no need to imagine anymore because it has happened. Shanice and Poh Kah were on this AEP trip with me to europe. I had forgotten how to distinguish the year2s from 3s, and my memory only clears when i refer to i'm not too sure if i can still call them 'my year4s'. When asked if i remembered the patrol, i started listing the names, only to realise that i'd always miss one or 2 people. I could remember the number of year2s, year3s etc, no problem, because of baoshu-ing during jihe, but i'd always get stuck with the last name (i dont mean the last name in this list. i purposely put that person's name somewhere in the middle so you wouldnt know who i almost missed out. ha.). Yiting Michelle (was p2 in my time. still is, to me. *ignores heng usan* haha.) Crystabelle Rachel Cassandra (was p2 in my time anyway) Adeline Chaining Poh Kah Shanice Danna Amanda Chinyee Huiyi (from band, but was at the aep trip) asked why i quit guides when we had dinner at the airport. I said that i didnt quit, just that i hadnt joined UG council. She understood what i had meant instantly, but after thinking about it throughout the 13 hour flight, i sort of wonder if there's a difference after all. This scout called Weilun sat diagonally behind me in the plane during the return trip. I hadnt known who he was throughout the trip because i didnt ask, and he didnt approach. Then when we got to the plane, i decided to get to know more juniors before the trip officially ended so i asked for his name. He replied, and added that he knew my name and asked if i was a guide so i assumed he was a scout (which he later confirmed when i asked how he had heard of my existence). I learnt something new about my old self (what juxtaposition eh?) from him, and it wasnt very flattering(to me lah), but im willing to accept that it might have been the case(: heard about pltc from him, about his favourite senior being zhengfeng(i asked, LOL) cos he was his PL, etc. Its been long. I havent been in touch with guides (or scouts). i know they often say 'once a guide, always a guide' but somehow its just this feeling of not belonging anymore when you dont join UG council right, fellow so-called ex-guides? I do feel that i'm not entitled to know whats going on in guides etc. This may not be true, but its an authentic feeling. ): If only year4 was forever. i'd have the best of so many worlds. sigh. back to my emails. 137 more to go-,- I just emailed Shiyi <3 She's such a darling. |
Drakon
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