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Saturday, October 1, 2011
I must be pretty old in terms of dream-age because i spend so much time there.Yesterday, i passed away in the prettiest way possible. It was a long dream because i had let myself sleep more to make up for the ills of the day, but i only remember the end, before my passing.  This is a poor paint illustration, but its the best that i could come up with in a short time. It doesnt capture the serenity that had been so encapsulating in my dream, but at least it shows you where i was. In this surreal set-up, i am the penguin on the right. I am not seeing this scene as a passive dreamer; whatever i experience is from a penguin's perspective. What you see are the penguins' back. It is a very cold night. Which night, i don't know, because in my mind, it seems to be the only one. It is going to last forever. The sun is never going to hurry it away. The ice that i am sitting on has melted and frozen again, forming a little seat that curved and cuddled me. It seems to float away, but not in any particular direction. Beside me is another penguin. Male; but i vaguely register this fact because in this instance, he is my companion; another one of my kind. We are not distinguished by our gender, but his being the other sex is representative of my existence as part of a larger community in which the male and female come together in union. Before us, in an ambiguous distance, is the city. It is lighted, and in any other cases, would have seemed alive. Yet it is quiet and it seems to be waiting. Not for something to happen; just waiting. Perhaps it is a reflection of our state of mind. I sit and let the silence speak because my companion is entranced; by what, i dont know. I am struck by the moment too. It is a very cold night. There is no breeze, and the chill is homogenised in the air around us. In our stillness, i realise that we are going to freeze to death. There is no calmness to speak of, but in its place, there is contentment. I am glad to die in this manner. Slowly, as i merge into my surroundings, i feel a strong sense of love even though my companion has yet to move. He is going to die too, but we are experiencing our own deaths and he is in no way involved in my passing away. We are not seated near each other. There is a distance between us, like in the illustration, to let us share this moment only with ourselves. Too much time has been given away to others; we owe ourselves our last few breaths. Then i begin to notice myself freezing. I feel the ice creeping up my body, and my warmth no longer melts the ice around me to reshape the seat. My last thought is that " I'm willing.", and then the silence ensues. |
Drakon
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